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March 23, 2006



i need to hire you to do a lecture on traditional french cuisine and trends for the modern paris... i think my students would love you... how good is your french?

Ms. Glaze

Oh Jeorg, you do NOT want me to teach in French. That would be hilarious for everyone else in the classroom but me. I have good comprehension, but when I open my mouth a mixture of Spanish and French flows out that no one seems to understand but myself.

The other day I asked the chef who prepares all of our food for the practicals if he had a big penis on accident. I was trying to ask if he had any big carrots but my accent came out wrong. He looked at me with the widest eyes I've ever seen and then started howling with laughter. Not good.

If I can be of any help developing curriculum or if you're interested in a lecture in English let me know! How old are your students?


in my email i forgot to tell you that they are college students...

King Negrito

Ah Brvao, now I am hungry like the wolf!!!


OMG. It all sounds so wonderful.

It all sounds so exciting.

I usually can't get a lot of excitement up over food but you make it sound magical.


Great post! That's why I love reading this blog so much. If you become a culinary star and you're on a cooking tour to China, I gonna show you where you can find some superior woks that fit your status well...


I understand your embarrassment with the French chef. When I was taking French is high school, I asked the Mother Superior, who was my French teacher, if she would like to French kiss with me. Needless to say, Sister was shocked. Unfortunately, she thought I was teasing and did not find it funny at all. My friends and other students thought it was hilarious. I still blush at this memory and it was over 40 years ago.


This all takes me back 40 years to 1966 when I was a fresh new student at the Sorbonne. On my second day, after sorting out all my papers and courses etc, I went into the Gibert Jeunes on the corner of Rue d'Écoles to buy s few books. Oh la vache! My French was obviously not as good as I expected. The bloke asked if he could help me and I started off saying, "Je voudrais des livres..." Half a dozen eyebrows shot up and people just burst out laughing. They were rolling in the aisles peeing themselves till they were blue in the face. Meanwhile mine was bright red. Oh merde. I've never, before or since, been so embarrassed. Eventually, the guy looked at me pityingly and gave me my first real French lesson in France. He had me repeating, over and over again, "Ve Ve De De -- Je VVouDDrais..." I had to stand there among all these brave citoyens and make a complete ass of myself. Best French lesson I ever had though. You see, my faintly English accent made the V sound like an F and the D like a T in their ears. You get my drift? I had just told the world that, "I would like to f**k some books." Still, I got my books and made a couple of new friends at the same time. There was this rather nice Italian girl who I eventually moved in with. Those were the days.

Just like King Negrito, food sites generally leave me cold. Not yours! I shall be back to see how you get on in Gay Paree. I love that city, but it's all very different now.


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